My constant battle: simultaneous feelings of both grief and happiness.
I must balance the complex emotions of honoring and remembering my late husband, while not letting memories overwhelm me to the point of sadness.
And at the same time, when I have moments where I’m happy and joyful, I have to push down the thoughts of guilt that say, “Your cup should still be filled with grief. There is no room for joy.”
But you know what??? Grief and joy can hold hands. It’s OK to be happy. Wayne would want that for me. God wants that for me.
I will always live with the brokenness of losing my husband, but will also strive for wholeness and happiness on this side of heaven.
“I will turn their mourning into joy…” Jeremiah 31:13